Re-Tales: confessions of a shopaholic

Color Me Pretty

imageWARNING! Stop reading if you’re easily offended by racy subject matter. Phew… now that we got that public service announcement out of the way, let’s get back to today’s Beauti-Fixation.

I can deal with a few stray grays on top of my head. A quick cab ride to my colorist and in a matter of hours, I’m back to my natural shade of chestnut brown. But salt ’n pepper hair down there is another story. Since I can’t bear the pain and monthly maintenance of Brazilian waxing, I now put my pubes in the very capable hands of Betty – a do-it-yourself hair coloring kit especially designed for beautifying below the belt.

Thanks to Betty’s brilliant line-up of semi-permanent shades, there’s no need to be bashful when exposing your nether region in front of strangers at the locker room. A safe and sassy way of ensuring “the collar matches the cuffs,” Betty may even spruce up your sex life. Perfect for prima donnas who can’t stomach the thought of clashing colors, as well as nudists, Betty offers an eye-catching array of au currant shades including blonde, auburn, black, brown and sunburst (a bright orange hue that comes with a sexy temporary tattoo). And for those who want to go Frenchie-style for Halloween, there’s even a flashy, hot pink “fun Betty.” Makes a great gift for special occasions such as birthdays, anniversaries and dare I say, weddings. In fact, I just bought the six-pack for a friend’s bridal shower.

You’ll also be pleased to know that each of the dyes are formulated with a gentle, no-drip formula and are free of harmful chemicals like ammonia, so you can freely spread the mascara-like applicator wand across your entire woo-woo without worrying about leakage into your sensitive areas. Just to be on the safe side, you might want to perform a skin allergy patch test 48 hours prior to use. Another bonus: you’ll only need to touch-up your triangle’s tresses every 3-4 weeks to maintain your desired shade. One thing’s for certain, now that I’ve found Betty, I just can’t help flashing my privates.

  • Betty Beauty
  • 212-308-0028
  • $20 per kit
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Filed: Beauti-Fixation

Fashionable Frocks

imageA degree in industrial engineering isn’t exactly the kind of background you’d expect to find in an emerging fashion designer. But for Indonesian-born Ardistia Dwiasri, it was her knack for numbers and interest in architectural design that prompted her to launch a namesake clothing collection. Now in its second season, Ardistia New York’s haute high-collar coats and cutting-edge, multi-functional separates have been flying off the racks at some of the hottest names in retail like Searle and Luxe Label.

A structured, Princess Warrior-inspired collection comprised of monochromatic fabrics of black and grey, Ardistia New York is favored by confident femmes who aren’t afraid to stand out. Touted for technical details such as exaggerated collars, tiered pleats and puff sleeves, Ardistia distinguishes herself from other designers by her uncanny ability to create hidden functionality in each of her frocks. For example, her stunning black capelet is constructed with secret arm slits so you can effortlessly slip your arm through to carry a shoulder bag (how brilliant!). Other crafty gadgets include zippers and buttons that enable you to instantly elongate or shorten sleeves. There’s even a jet-black jacket that can magically morph into a cape. Among the many items on my radar screen include a gorgeous gabardine capelet with quilted shoulders, a silk chiffon baby doll dress, a slinky jersey blouse with satin trim (perfect with patent booties and opaque tights) and a striking dove gray swing coat with ¾ length puff sleeves. With styles this sexy and streamlined, I wasn’t surprised to hear that most of Ardistia’s inventory is already on back order this season. If you happen to miss out, have no fear – they’ll be an equally impressive and expanded lineup of 007-like silhouettes this Spring.

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Filed: Clothes Encounters


imageThe Lower East Side (L.E.S.) has certainly come a long way to shed its cheap shmatta and old-school tailor image. While performing my weekly shopping reconnaissance missions, I’ve noticed an emergence of hipster clothing boutiques, bars and restos that have recently popped-up in the hood. From one-of-a-kind vintage finds (Tahir Boutique), indie handbags, shoes and baubles (Clarabella) to eco-friendly fashions (Kaight), the L.E.S. offers an undeniably cool collective of shops not found anywhere else in the city.

To celebrate the burgeoning L.E.S. revival, owners from several edgy establishments have banded together to host the ultimate block party. The first of a series of monthly events, next Thursday’s L.E.S. Shop Night will offer exclusive designer trunk shows, special discounts, tasty treats and martinis ‘til midnight.

Get set for guilt-free shopping, as participating stores will donate 10% of the evening’s sales to the L.E.S. Girls Club of New York, an organization dedicated to assisting in the development of girls and young women ages 8-23. The shopping equivalent of a pub-crawl, L.E.S. Shop Night promises to be the swankiest buying and boozing extravaganza of the season. So grab the girls and don your party frocks ‘n flats – you’ll be shopping and hopping ‘til you drop.


  • When: Thursday, September 20, 2006
  • Time: shops from 6-10pm, bars & restaurants from 9pm-midnight!
  • Where: Lower East Side

Participating Boutiques:

Participating Bars/Restaurants:

Happy Shopping!

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Filed: Shop Talk

Extra! Extra!

imageRead all about it! “SEXY MOTHER PUCKER… Lip Size Found Crucial For Sexual Attraction!” No, it’s not the front page headline from today’s New York Post, but a “cheeky” tagline emblazoned on the bubblegum-colored packaging of a lip-plumper from British-based beauty company, Soap & Glory.

With 8 kitschy bath and beauty essentials whose names were inspired by the daily tabloids, Soap & Glory just landed stateside at my fave masstige retailer, Target. Created by Marcia Kilgore, the mastermind behind Bliss, Soap & Glory is her irreverent sister line that’s half the price (nothing tops $25) and practically just as good. Meant to moisturize the masses, Soap & Glory’s mantra is that “a good laugh can take off as many years as a good lift.” Don’t let the slapstick humor fool you – these pun-filled products do indeed work.

Soap & Glory’s sensational lineup includes a stress-battling, lemon-infused bubble bath (Calm One, Calm All), a super-sized shower gel (Clean On Me), a skin-sloughing body buffer (The Scrub Of Your Life), a velvety smooth body butter (The Righteous Butter), a sexy lotion with shimmer (Glow Lotion), a hydrating hand cream (Great Shakes) and an almost edible sugar, shea butter and peach-infused body polish (Flake Away). My personal favorite is Sexy Mother Pucker, a tasty trio of tingly lip-plumping glosses that actually smell like chocolate – something missing from the captions on the box. After layering Super Starry (shimmery clear) on top of What A Melon (sheer pink), I came pretty close to having Angelina Jolie’s sought-after bee-stung pout. Regardless of what you slather on, Soap & Glory is sure to keep you smiling.

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Filed: Beauti-Fixation

Seasonal Staples

Aside from dark chocolate and a double shot of espresso, nothing gets my adrenaline pumping more than fall fashion. In fact, I got so wrapped up with this season’s alluring assortment of fabrics (tartans to tweeds) and colors (cobalt blue to charcoal gray), that I couldn’t help but purchase 90% of my wardrobe when pre-fall shipments hit stores in July. But, since I still need a few more staples, here’s a short list of what I’m eyeing next. And it just so happens that everything can be worn separately or paired together for a perfect day-to-night look.

imageWhy risk throwing your back out with a bulky, over-sized bag?  Instead, play-up your wardrobe with a petite frame purse that works with your proportions, like this lightweight Charlott Vasberg ($800) find. The shimmery black leather and matte gold hardware add that extra touch of glam. Buy it at • 888.222.7639

imageHere’s the skinny on denim for fall: stovepipes are out and baggy, wide-legged styles like these Seven’s ($209) are in. Finally, a pair of blues that doesn’t require plastic Baggie’s to slide ‘em over your feet. Buy it at • 877-746-7267

imageIf there’s one must-have piece you splurge on this season, make it this mustard blazer from Smythe ($698). It’s a well-priced alternative to the ones I’ve seen from Marc Jacobs and in my opinion, a much better fit. Buy it at • 212-924-4330

imageSimply put, Cobalt blue is the “it color” of the season. It works wonders for almost any complexion and will instantly brighten up your mood. This billowy Madison Marcus blouse ($225) is my personal fave because it pairs beautifully with black, wide-legged trousers. The feminine neck-tie, pleats and puffy sleeves make it that much more irresistible. Buy it at • 204-292-1524

imageUnleash your inner Victor Victoria with this smokin’ pinstriped fedora ($38) – a guaranteed head-turner. Finally, there’s no excuse for bad hair days, period. Buy it at • 800-862-0100

imageStep into the season with confidence with a shoe bootie – a stiletto that thinks and behaves like a boot. An edgier alternative to a pump, Christian Louboutin’s patent leather zippered pair ($770) glams up your gams, even when worn with nothing else.
Buy it at • 877.551.SAKS

For a sneak preview of my top picks for Spring ’08, stay tuned for next Monday’s special New York Fashion Week runway report.


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Filed: Clothes Encounters